Shiny Truths

 

( a light-hearted note- just for humor only no offence intended🙂)

There comes a period in man’s life : when his hairlines are pretty active – I mean – busy falling off;

Hair loss is typically considered the domain of aging men, and this can affect virtually anyone who has a serviceable head,.Particularly in mid-40s, —

hairloss has many causes, the chief one being teenage children —

Every man sheds about 100 hairs each day as part of the normal hair growth cycle. This principle doesn’t apply to Bollywood Actor Anil Kapoor though, who actually gains 100 hairs each hour.

 

My friend : Sridhar (name changed to protect identity) from his original name of Krishnappa – was follicle challenged  - politically correct word for baldness! Especially I don’t want to talk   much about baldness be “Will Smithed” had Chris "Rocked"

Sridhar was going through a huge stress : because ofbaldophobia 

People are so fearful of showing-off their hairless real-estate of their head!...that Hair Experts says that “Hair-Loss” prevention is $5Billion Industry world-wide…with unlimited potential for growth...I mean business growth. People who are follicle challenged can resort to any means to get hair growth back…

 

But I tried to comfort him : through my Self-help books inspiration as  below:

Less is More : Sridhar ,you know : Money or Hair – Less is mOre! Less Hair is a blessing in disguise : because : you can save a lot of money on Shampoo and Hair-creams and Dyes!

Sridhar : thanks for crap motivation talk mukund: what I save on shampoo and hair-creams , I have to spend on face-wash and face-cream as I have an extended forehead!

Then I tried this :

You know Baldness is a great leveler of mankind: It affects the kings and commoners alike – Baldness cuts across – rather shaves across – color,creed  or cultures; Look at Prince Philip! He has been bald since age 8 ; even for that matter : thalaiva rajnikanth is bald:

Sridhar gave me an ironic grin: Prince Philip has Kohinoor crown to cover his head! And Thalaivar does not need hair-style now!

Fellow Toasmasters and Dear guests:

Hair baldness affects 90% of male Population world-wide: ; Scientifically, Baldenss is called as “Alopecia “ – receding hairlines…in its severe form, Baldness becomes : Alopecia Totalis” – total washout! 

UN-WHO Doctors have provided a severe warning on Alopecia Totalis : as it leads to severe Blindness; yes! They have advised patients suffering from alopecia not to venture out during summer without head-cover  ; if not , the glare from sun’s reflections on their balding pate can cause day blindess in totality for the oncoming drivers!

 

More importantly Sridhar , informed me : Mukund ,you don’t know my condition! Its debilitating and I am feeling as if I am another person! Not myself at all!

I tried so many solutions Mukund : Organic and Inorganic:

Organic:

Onion Juice treatement:

Peel, wash and chop your onions then process in a blender (or use a grater). Strain the pulp and extract as much juice as possible, then massage the juice into your scalp. Leave it on for about half an hour…now we don't know if hair will grow but we are sure that none to come near you for the next week.

 

Say you are asked to return to office instead of virtual work,when you used this onion juice on head , This treatment will act as effective  repellent against your boss!

 

 

Tabasco: hot chilli pepper sauce to head!

 

If the thought of a Friday night chilli pepper sauce on Pizza makes your eyes water, then the idea of applying Tabasco to your scalp may well cause steam to gush out your ears.

 

Tabasco has capsaicin, the active ingredient in hot peppers, stimulates hair growth. So, before you grab the Tabasco from the kitchen cupboard and smear it liberally on your bonnet, consider the dangers of it getting in your eyes, the potential burns to your skin and the enduring odour of chilli con carne that’s likely to remain on your person for days.

 

Mukund, I also tried inorganic :

I tried hair Wigs : but my sister is part PETA movement : she threatened me to throw out of house :Say No to Rugs in any form! I had to throw out my wigs!

Finally I had to use age old technique: “Comb-over”

 

Comb it over : essentially you need to cover exposed portion of your head with hair from remaining portion…if you want to know how…you gotta great example in : Donald trump …The king of comb-overs,; Donald Trump, can show you how to do it. Do it any other way and... you're fired!

 

Sridhar said:But that’s not an option for me as I am total bald now:

After this : I could not meet Sridhar for around 5 months; then I saw his WhatsApp DP : full beard-and –all like lockdown get-up! Could see the depression in his eyes!

I had to help my friend here! I was lost for solutions : That’s when I happened to read an article by Carl Jacobi – swiss mathematician ! – he says : Invert always Invert! ( man muss immer umkehren)

 If you want success, for example, dont chase success...instead avoid failures!

Voila! Eureka! I got a breakthrough!

So I took Sridhar's DP photo and inverted it...

With a trimmed photoshopped beard baldness added to his handsomeness

I took Sridhar to nearest saloon : and got him an elegant French-beard! No body called him bald again!

You  think I am hoodwinking you: by growing french beards...ie.,cover their shiny top by growing beards! and believe me it works ; it works because it is founded on essential psychological principle called "Inversion".

Sometimes Truth is also Shiny😉